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in praise of kindly old men. [09 Nov 2009|10:45am]
> From: Garry Messick <xxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: This is beautiful
> To: "grant b, sun reporter" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Monday, November 9, 2009, 10:33 AM
>
> I came across this on Jonathan Carroll's blog:
>
> "Near the end of his life, living in Berlin with his
> lover, Franz Kafka went for a walk in the park and saw a
> little girl crying.
> He asked her what the matter was, and she told him that
> she had lost her doll.
> Without missing a beat, Kafka assured the little girl that
> the doll wasn't lost, only traveling; Kafka knew this for a
> fact, he said, because the doll had written him a letter
> describing her journeys, which he promised to bring the girl
> the next day.
> Every day for three weeks, he brought the girl a new letter
> that he had spent much of the previous night composing,
> until she could no longer remember why she had been sad in
> the first place."
>
> Jeff Turrentine
3 comments|post comment

harper's, I pwn you. [24 Sep 2009|06:22pm]
> From: Balfour, Grant <xxxxxxxx@xxxxxxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Regarding http://harpers.org/archive/2008/03/hbc-90002719
> To: harpers@harpers.org
> Date: Thursday, September 24, 2009, 6:19 PM
>
>
>
> Hi.
>
>
> I hate to be the one to point this out to you, but there's a really
> funny mistake in Scott Horton's otherwise solid translation of Pablo
> Neruda's "Song of Despair."
>
>
>
>
> The Spanish word "muelles," as in "Abandonado como los muelles en el alba,"
> means "docks" or "wharves." It doesn't mean "dwarves."
>
>
>
>
> (That image is a bit like Tolkien, or maybe Tom Waits.)
>
>
>
>
> You've got the line right when it repeats at the end of the poem, but not when
> it first occurs. Since your page is one of the first returns when one searches
> the internet for "Song of Despair," I thought it was worth mentioning.
>
>
>
>
>
> Thanks,
>
>
> Grant Balfour.
8 comments|post comment

one of our most awkward letters.... [17 Sep 2009|11:23am]
> > From: Rxxxxx Txxxxxx <xxxxxxxxxx@xxx.xxx>
> > Subject: Good Doc
> > To: "Grant B" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Date: Thursday, September 17, 2009, 10:23 AM
> >
> > Pg. 50 story attached; clip on fax.
> >
>
>
> From: grant b, sun reporter <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Re: Good Doc
> To: Rxxxxx Txxxxxx <xxxxxxxxxx@xxx.xxx>
> Date: Thursday, September 17, 2009, 11:20 AM
> Rxxxxx,
>
> This isn't a publishing crisis or a criticism in any way,
> but you need to know that this is nearly the same story you
> submitted for the 4th page Good Doc last week - the same
> source material but rewritten from scratch, as far as I can
> tell. On our end, there's no problem - we're just
> dearchiving a story from 2004 to fill the hole.
>
> On your end, I think you really should consider a visit to
> a real good doctor (as opposed to the one you play before a
> national readership) to make sure that head injury isn't
> playing games with your memory.
>
> We're all very concerned that you may have suffered a
> concussion or even have had a stroke due to the fall.
> We worry, Rxxxxx. Your well-being comes first.
> Go see someone.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> gb
>
>
5 comments|post comment

i... i think i feel lightheaded now.... bless you, internet.... [24 Jul 2009|12:29pm]
> From: George Hansen <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Real magic and legerdemain
> To: grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx
> Date: Friday, July 24, 2009, 11:11 AM
> Hi Grant,
>
> I saw a post on LiminalNation that I think you wrote
> regarding real magic and trick magic.
>
> I thought you might be interested in a recent review that
> covers both--
>
> http://www.tricksterbook.com/ArticlesOnline/Muhlenberg2009-ConferenceReview.pdf
>
> or
>
> http://tinyurl.com/4pskh2
>
> This is a PDF file.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> George P. Hansen
>
> Author: The Trickster and the Paranormal
> http://www.tricksterbook.com
>
> http://paranormaltrickster.blogspot.com/
>
> https://twitter.com/ParaTrickster
>
>
>
post comment

a work email intercept from psychic nikki [22 Jul 2009|10:39am]
> From: xxxxxx@xxxxxx.xxxxxxxxxx.xxx <xxxxxx@xxxxxx.xxxxxxxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Correction
> To: grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx
> Date: Wednesday, July 22, 2009, 2:29 AM
>
> A meteorite hits the southwestern
> united states. Thanks nikki
>
> Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless
> Network
5 comments|post comment

moving forward on the "liveaboard" concept [11 Jun 2009|12:02pm]
> --- On Thu, 6/11/09, jeannie <xxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx> wrote:
>
> > From: jeannie <xxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Subject: boat owner
> > To: "Grant Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Date: Thursday, June 11, 2009, 11:36 AM
> >
> > I would suggest you start paying visits to docks and get
> > the low down. Take one of the kids for some daddy time and
> > check out the scene.
> >
> >
>
> From: grant b, sun reporter <xxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Re: boat owner
> To: "jeannie" <xxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Thursday, June 11, 2009, 12:00 PM
>
> I absolutely love that my wife is
> telling me to make some "daddy time" by taking the kids
> "down to the docks."
>
> Oh, God.
>
> I can teach Sophia how to throw craps and make
> boilermakers!
>
16 comments|post comment

hell of a world for new baby to be born into. [10 Jun 2009|03:05pm]
> From: grant b, sun reporter <xxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
>
> Subject: Holocaust Museum shooter.
>
> To: "ilona balfour" <xxxxxx@xxx.xxx>, "Toni work Balfour" <xxxx@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Wednesday, June 10, 2009, 2:52 PM
>
> He left a manifesto on his website:
>
> http://xrl.us/bewa7n
>
> And more stuff in the Google cache:
>
> http://xrl.us/bewa79
>
> Keep his buddies the hell away from my niece.
>
3 comments|post comment

the zine is a dictionary of JOY. Check it out. [03 Jun 2009|10:15am]
--- On Wed, 6/3/09, Guy Lochhead <xxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxxxxxx.xxx> wrote:

> From: Guy Lochhead <xxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxxxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Re: possible interview?
> To: "Grant" <grantimatter@yahoo.com>
> Date: Wednesday, June 3, 2009, 6:51 AM
> Hello again Grant!
> The zine is complete! And I think it's pretty good.. You
> can download
> a PDF of it from our awful MySpace:
> http://www.myspace.com/aballfortheeyes (in the first blog)
> Or I can send you a paper copy? It's a lot nicer as a real
> thing I
> think because it's quite thick (60 pages) and we used a
> great printers
> called Footprint (http://footprinters.co.uk)... Just let me know
> where to send it, if you'd like one..
> Also, if you're interested, I just finished making a little
> CD. It's
> called 'At Home With Skate Rock' (Skate Rock being my very
> serious artist name), and it's free to download from here:
> http://www.bestnewfun.co.uk
> Or you can buy a CD copy from me or Alien Kiosk
> (http://myspace.com/neilakiosk) for £2..
> I'm really pleased with how the zine turned out, and I
> think you're
> enthusiasm and support really made a difference in keeping
> Poppy and I
> excited about the idea. I'm really grateful for your
> willingness to be
> interviewed, and I hope you enjoy the finished thing.
> Thank you again,
> Guy
>
post comment

i told him to look at stereo sanctity, too. [04 May 2009|01:51pm]
> > From: Guy Lochhead <xxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxxxxxx.xxx>
> > Subject: possible interview?
> > To: guildmaster@guildofscientifictroubadours.com
> > Date: Monday, May 4, 2009, 12:27 PM
> >
> > Hello Grant
> >
> > I am writing to ask if I could interview you for a small
> > (tiny)
> > magazine I'm trying to put together.
> >
> > My name is Guy Lochhead and I live in England. I'm trying
> > to start a
> > little 'zine'-type thing called Eye Ball with my girlfriend
> > Poppy. I
> > hope that it will be available for free online, and also to
> > buy in
> > physical form for as cheap as possible at various little
> > festivals and
> > things.
> >
> > I hope to fill the magazine with independent musicians and
> > artists
> > from all over the world - from... contemporary hardcore
> > groups to
> > Indian pirate radio station owners to.. you know,
> > whatever.. Poppy's
> > submissions have a sort of amateur scientific interest. I
> > can't really
> > be more specific than that because I don't really know..
> > She's spoken
> > about writing articles about fasha, white lions,
> > extinction, and a few
> > things on mythology and shamanism.
> >
> > We feel like your Guild of Scientific Troubadours ties
> > these two
> > approaches together, as well as being a totally fantastic,
> > admirable
> > collection of songs, and think it would be wonderful to
> > include some
> > words from you on the formation and progress of the
> > project.
> >
> > If you are willing to be interviewed, perhaps we could set
> > up a Google
> > Chat, or I could just e-mail you some questions? Whatever's
> > best for
> > you.
> >
> > I hope to hear from you soon. It's an especially exciting
> > idea for me
> > because I first came across your www.grantimatter.com site
> > a few years
> > ago, when I was about fourteen/fifteen. Yours was one of
> > the first
> > musicians/bands that I discovered on my own, and it kind of
> > set me off
> > on the cycle of devouring that I'm going to turn into my
> > part of this
> > magazine..
> >
> > Thank you very much,
> > Guy
> >
2 comments|post comment

if only they could all be so kind. [03 May 2009|05:00pm]
> > From:
> > "grant b, sun reporter"
> > <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > To: Richard Jankovich (Burnside
> > Project Pocket) <xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Sent: Friday,
> > April 17, 2009 8:02:04 AM
> > Subject:
> > Sampo
> >
> >
> > So I've done something else... something unspeakable...
> > to "Sampo." It's not 100% done yet, but should
> > have a submittable by this weekend.
> >
> > I thought you should have an early warning.
> >
> > Oh, and here are the lyrics, as translated by Kalin
> Wilson,
> > who lives in Japan.
> >
> > -------------
>
> --- On Fri, 4/17/09, Richard Jankovich <burnsideproject@yahoo.com>
> wrote:
>
> > "Richard Jankovich" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Subject: Re: Sampo
> > "grant b, sun reporter" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Date: Friday, April 17, 2009, 5:03 PM
> >
> > Wow - you are scaring me.... )
post comment

sorry, wrong number. *sigh* [10 Dec 2008|10:22pm]
> > > From: Facebook <confirm+osf9y4tc@facebookmail.com>
> > > Subject: Jenny Chadwick added you as a friend on Facebook...
> > > To: "Grant Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxx.xxx>
> > > Date: Wednesday, December 10, 2008, 1:42 PM
> > >
> > > Jenny added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to
> > > confirm that you know Jenny in order for you to be
> > > friends on Facebook.
> > >
> > > Jenny says, "Not sure if this is the real
> > > Grant.....but if it is....thankyou for that cup of
> > > coffee you handed me over the wall at one of your games.
>
> > > Best cup ever. lol. Jenny.".
> > >
> > > To confirm this friend request, follow the link below:
> >
> > > http://www.facebook.com/n/?reqs.php
> > >
> > > Thanks,
> > > The Facebook Team
> > >
> --- On Wed, 12/10/08, grant b, sun reporter
> <grantimatter@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> > From: grant b, sun reporter <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xx>
> > Subject: Fw: Jenny Chadwick added you as a friend on Facebook...
> > To: "Jeannie Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Date: Wednesday, December 10, 2008, 3:51 PM
> >
> > She's a Hooter's manager in Clearwater, and
> > she's single.
> >
> > Dude.
> >
> > -------------
> From: J. Balfour <xxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Re: Fw: Jenny Chadwick added you as a friend on Facebook...
> To: xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx
> Date: Wednesday, December 10, 2008, 4:05 PM
>
> Such a gentleman.
>
>
post comment

passing the beetle [04 Dec 2008|11:39am]
> From: Facebook <notification+osf9y4tc@facebookmail.com>
> Subject: Van Choojitarom sent you a message on Facebook...
> To: "Grant Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Wednesday, December 3, 2008, 9:46 PM
> Van sent you a message.
>
> --------------------
> Subject: It snowed, and the snow screamed
>
> My Dear Mr. Balfour,
>
> I've been meaning to send you a profound note of thanks
> for passing "The Beetle"; I really could not put
> it down, that is, until I put it down to serve as a
> อุบาสก at a Buddhist monastery in Plant City.
>
> I'm actually headed back there in January and then onto
> Thailand where I will eventually ordain.
>
> I mention this because, even thought I am still very much
> at the "wax on, wax off" stage in terms of my
> tutelage under my master; however, the more time I spend
> meditating and the more I practice mindfulness, the more I
> find myself experiencing what I think of as
> "Grant-like" states -though they are difficult to
> maintain.
>
>
> As for our saison en enfer, I assure you it was in the
> winter; Remember the ice skating? Only tourists go in the
> summer, the same ones that run up to the ice cream wagon and
> expect ice cream.
> --------------------
>
> To reply to this message, follow the link below:
> http://www.facebook.com/n/?inbox/readmessage.php
13 comments|post comment

at least the stabbing has stopped. [05 Nov 2008|11:18am]
> > From: Nicholas Meihuizen
> <xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xx.xxx>
> > Subject: Congratulations on your new president
> > To: "sun reporter grant b"
> <grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Date: Wednesday, November 5, 2008, 2:02 AM
> >
> > Dear Grant
> > Amazing.
> > Uncle Nick
> >
> > Nicholas Meihuizen
> > xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xx.xxx
> >
> >
> From: grant b, sun reporter <grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Re: Congratulations on your new president
> To: "Nicholas Meihuizen" <xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx@xx.xxx>
> Date: Wednesday, November 5, 2008, 11:16 AM
>
> I think this observation from a British friend sums it up
> best:
>
>

> >>the poor bastard's got one hell of a job to
> do

>
> Better that he try rather than the Reps. The contrast
> between GWB and Obama should be startling (hopefully) like
> bandaging an injured patient instead of repeatedly stabbing
> them with a rusty knife. Yes, the patient is in a bad way
> and it's going to be difficult to stop the bleeding, but
> at least the stabbing has stopped. You've got to look
> on the bright side, eh.
> <<

>
> (From here: http://www.barbelith.com/topic/28652#post782669 )
>
> At least the stabbing has stopped!
>
> In Obama, Japan, they did hula dances last night.
>
> I wonder... if I was elected president, what would they do
> in Balfour, South Africa?
>
> -------------
2 comments|post comment

the extinction metaphor [29 Oct 2008|08:16am]
> > --- On Mon, 10/27/08, amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx
> > <amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx> wrote:
> >
> > From: amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx
> <amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Subject: Thought of you both...
> > To: "Pamela Mxxxxxx"
> > <pxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>,
> > <grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Date: Monday, October 27, 2008, 4:44 PM
> >
> >
> >
> >
> http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y138/tizzzodd/holy_shit_this_is_awesome.jpg
> >
> >
> >
> > Visit me at my blog:
> > http://amyloula.typepad.com/
>
>
>
> > From: Pamela Mxxxxxx <pxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Subject: Re: Thought of you both...
> > To: "Grant "
> <grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx>,
> amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx
> > Date: Monday, October 27, 2008, 4:53 PM
> >
> >
> > What? Why?!!! Are we the only nerds you know? ;-)
> >
> >
>
> -------------
>
> From: grant b, sun reporter <grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: Re: Thought of you both...
> To: amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx, Pxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx
> Date: Tuesday, October 28, 2008, 3:23 PM
>
> I actually had to give up the dinosaur.
>
> Couldn't afford the meat. This economy is killing us.
>
>
>
> -------------
>
> >
> > From: Pamela Mxxxxxx <pxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> > Subject: Re: Thought of you both...
> To: amyxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx, grantimatter@xxxxx.xxx
> Date: Tuesday, October 28, 2008, 10:09 PM
>
> You at least had one. I couldn't get financing. P
1 comment|post comment

news from galveston: gone to goat island [22 Oct 2008|09:46pm]
> From: xxxxxx@xxxx.xxx
> Date: Wednesday, October 22, 2008, 5:02 PM
>
> On another, completely different note: yet another
> body's been found
> on a small piece of land just behind the Bolivar peninsula.
> For some
> reason its name always seemed ominous to me before, and
> it's doubly
> so now:
>
> Goat Island. Resting place for at least four corpses...
> maybe a lot
> more. Apparently the dogs have found multiple "hot
> spots" in the
> debris piles there
>
> At lunch my friend Mxxx Hxxxxx referred to some item lost
> from her
> flooded house as having "gone to Goat Island."
>
> She and her husband have decided that's what
> they're going to say
> whenever their kids want to know where a toy is -
> "It's gone to Goat
> Island."
>
> Freaky.
>
>
1 comment|post comment

At the Collider: Art from Science [23 Sep 2008|12:26pm]
> From: grant b, sun reporter <xxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Subject: At the Collider: Art from Science.
> To: press.office@cern.ch
> Date: Tuesday, September 23, 2008, 12:24 PM
>
> Hello, CERN.
>
> I'm grant.
>
> I... well, I made a song. It's about the Large Hadron
> Collider. It's meant as a sort of scientific anthem.
>
> You can find it here, along with a brief description:
> http://guildofscientifictroubadours.com/?p=614
>
> I felt, having completed recording this draft late, late
> last night, that those of you who inspired the song should
> know it exists. (Especially the last minute and a half).
>
> May inspiration smile on all your efforts.
>
2 comments|post comment

On recovery, and carrying the torch [25 Jun 2008|11:03am]
> From: Jenny Bowen <xxxxx@halfthesky.org>
> Subject: The Big Top, The Torch, and Monopoly
> To: "Grant Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Tuesday, June 24, 2008, 7:48 PM
...
>
> One smiling boy bears the most obvious scar of that day—a
> gash that took
> fourteen stitches to close. It runs alongside his eye down
> to his mouth.
> Like all of the children who survived, he is mindful of
> friends who did
> not: “At first I felt guilty that I survived. Now because
> I am volunteering I feel more comfortable.”
>
> The students from Juyuan also provide an example of what
> was perhaps
> NCSTB’s Dr. Marleen Wong’s most surprising message to
> the caregivers she
> trained in Sichuan. In the midst of the all-too-obvious
> devastation and
> pain wrought by the earthquake, Wong introduced new
> research about a
> phenomenon called “post-traumatic growth.” A small
> percentage of children,
> says Wong, will make positive life changes that are a
> direct result of a
> trauma or a disaster. These are the children, says Wong who
> become “wise
> beyond their years, more mature, have a deeper appreciation
> of life,” in
> the wake of a tragedy. “They have new values and life
> priorities.”
>
> One Juyuan student explains that not only has he resolved
> to volunteer in
> the wake of the earthquake, he has also resolved to change
> his life:
> “Before the earthquake I was not into studying. Now I
> think it is the most
> important thing I can do so I can help my country. I can
> bring hope to the people in Sichuan.”
>
> The day after BigTop #1 opened, I had the great honor of
> carrying the
> Olympic Torch on behalf of China’s orphaned children,
> especially those
> newly orphaned in Sichuan and Chongqing. Fifty
> preschoolers from our Half
> the Sky programs in Chengdu and Chongqing joined me on a
> rainy Sunday in
> Wanzhou, Chongqing. It was an exhilarating and wacky time.
> And we did
> manage to tell the children’s story – at least to the
> Chinese media (in
> the end, no foreign media was allowed.) We were on the
> front page of the
> China Daily and featured on national TV news. We didn’t
> quite go global,
> but it has been wonderful to hear from so many Chinese
> citizens who want
> to help orphaned children. Children in their own
> communities that they didn’t even know existed.
>
2 comments|post comment

one month after [13 Jun 2008|11:36am]
> From: Jenny Bowen <xxxxx@halfthesky.org>
> Subject: The Earthquake – a month later…and news on the Torch
> To: "Grant Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Friday, June 13, 2008, 10:28 AM
> Hello Friends,
>
> We got a call today telling us that, for security reasons,
> our Torch leg
> is now scheduled a day earlier. I will be running in
> Wanzhou, Chongqing,
> on Sunday, June 15 - Father's Day. I will still run
> for the children,
> especially those of Sichuan. Somehow, we will manage to
> bring the children
> there. I hope it doesn’t change again!
>
> I just arrived in Chongqing from Sichuan. Yesterday was
> the one month
> anniversary of the earthquake. We traveled several hours
> to a hard-hit
> mountain town in Beichuan, Hongbaizhen, and worked with
> children and
> volunteer teachers. I have added many photos to our
> website:
> http://www.halfthesky.org/work/earthquake08-healing.php#part2
>
> A couple of weeks earlier, we braved the rock-strewn roads
> and broken
> bridges of Hongbaizhen to deliver relief goods to the
> children. The whole
> town was in shock. As painful as yesterday’s visit was,
> we began to see
> signs that the town will slowly begin to come back to life.
>
> Our communications director, Patricia King gave me this
> moving report:
>
> An 8-year-old boy stands in front of the pile of rubble
> that had once been
> his school and explains that he was the last student to
> have been pulled
> out alive. When the earth shook, he was one of the obedient
> children
> sitting with arms crossed at their desks—some naughty boys were still outside, safe on the playground.... )
post comment

Half the Sky: Olympic torch, Building schools. [10 Jun 2008|10:35am]
> From: Jenny Bowen <jenny@halfthesky.org>
> Subject: Half the Sky Earthquake Update - June 10
> To: "Grant Balfour" <xxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxx.xxx>
> Date: Tuesday, June 10, 2008, 6:21 AM
> Dear Friends,
>
> Last October – what seems like a lifetime ago – many of
> you voted online
> and made it possible for me to win the Lenovo/China Daily
> competition to
> become one of eight foreigners living in China to carry the
> Olympic Torch.
> My goal was to run with children from our HTS programs on
> behalf of all of
> China’s orphaned children. As fate or happenstance would
> have it, my bit
> of Torch history is now scheduled to take place in Wanzhou,
> Chongqing on
> June 16 – just next door to earthquake-battered Sichuan.
>
> After the quake, I informed the Beijing Olympic Committee
> (BOCOG) that I
> would dedicate my run to the orphaned children of Sichuan.
> For security
> reasons, BOCOG will not let me run WITH the children, but
> they will
> certainly let me run FOR them. And BOCOG will let the
> children urge me
> along from the sidelines. So, if all goes well, 50 > preschoolers from the > Chengdu and Chongqing orphanages will be with me in > Wanzhou. )
post comment

reddit.com on Obama's running mate. [04 Jun 2008|10:10am]

jordanlund 251 points 14 hours ago[-]

Obama needs a VP who:

1) Is successful at business interests to attract Republicans. They love the whole "run government like it's a business" thing.

2) Ideally female, to counter the shrill Clintonistas who say that he's misogynist.

3) Someone who makes him assassin-proof to all the red-necks.

There is only one person who meets this criteria... Ladies and gentlemen... Introducing...

Vice President Oprah.

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JohnStanier 42 points 14 hours ago[-]

Well played sir.

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AnteChronos 27 points 12 hours ago* [-]

"Now if all you congressmen/women would look under you seats, you'll find a set of keys . . . . to your new electric car! And be sure to be here for next week's judicial appropriations oversight committee meeting / vice presidential book club!"

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keenfob 3 points 10 hours ago[-]

and you get a car, and you get a car, and you too!!

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